Lately I’ve been feeling a bit disconnected from my first daughter, and it’s been weighing on me. It’s not that I love her any less or that she suddenly matters less — it’s just that so much of my attention automatically goes to the baby now. My second one is still so little, and half the time I’m just scared she’ll fall or bump into something, so I keep hovering around her.

But while I’m doing that, my older one is watching. And I can see it in her eyes — she feels like my priorities have shifted. She gets angry with me sometimes, or snaps, or just pulls away. And honestly, it hurts. I know she’s just trying to make sense of all this. She used to have me fully, without sharing. Now she has to wait her turn, and for a kid her age, that’s a big deal.

I feel bad about it at times. I understand where she’s coming from — she’s suddenly sharing her mum, her space, and even her routines. It’s a lot for her. And I’m also doing my best, but some days I feel stretched thin.

I’m trying to find little moments to reconnect with her… even if it’s five minutes of just us cuddling, or reading a book, or talking about her day while the baby sleeps. Those small moments help, but I still worry whether it’s enough.

If you’ve been through something like this — balancing two little ones and a shifting emotional landscape — how do you handle it? How do you make sure your older child still feels seen and loved?