Every birthday , my daughters receive a familiar set of gifts — kitchen sets, dolls, and soft toys. They come wrapped in bright paper and good intentions, but behind them I feel there sits something deeper: society’s quiet expectations of what girls “should” enjoy.

It’s subtle, but powerful. A kitchen set says, “You belong in the kitchen.” A doll says, “You’re meant to nurture.” A soft toy says, “Be gentle, not bold.” These toys, on their own, are not the problem — but when they become the only kind of play offered to girls, they begin shaping how girls see themselves and what they think they can do.

I often ask myself, Would I give a boy the same toy? If the answer is no, then perhaps the gift is rooted in stereotype, not imagination.

The Messages We Send Through Play

Children learn about the world through play. The toys they hold are often their first tools to experiment, imagine, and problem-solve. When girls are surrounded only by domestic or “cute” toys, and not building blocks, science kits, and cars, we’re unconsciously telling them where their curiosity is welcome — and where it isn’t.

I want my daughters to believe they can build, explore, invent, and lead. I want them to see that curiosity has no gender. So I consciously choose toys that challenge, not confine. Instead of a kitchen set, maybe a science kit. Instead of another plush toy, maybe a puzzle that sparks creative thinking.

I look for exploratory toys, STEM kits, adventure stories, or books . Gifts that ignite questions rather than reinforce expectations. A telescope or a coding game might not be the typical choice for a little girl’s birthday, but the sparkle in her eyes when she discovers something new — that’s priceless.

Raising Curious Minds, Not Perfect Little Girls

I’m not against dolls or kitchen sets — my daughters play with them, too. The goal isn’t to eliminate traditionally “feminine” toys, but to expand the range of what’s offered. Girls should have access to all kinds of play — nurturing, building, messy, adventurous, and creative.

Toys are more than entertainment; they are tools of imagination. And imagination is what shapes identity.

And every small choice we make today can help raise a generation that dreams beyond stereotypes.